The entire journey from deciding to get a divorce, and finally getting one can be quite an emotionally, physically, and financially taxing journey for all parties involved. The thought of these long drawn-out and difficult times is what keeps many couples from going through with the process.
Effects Of Divorce On Adults Psychologically
However, for those who do go through with their decision, there are some bad effects of divorce that they have experienced. It is not only women who feel the after-effects of divorce. It is equally difficult for men, not to mention for kids, even those who are older. Divorce and children is especially tricky. But sometimes a separation is the best or only option. You’ve got to do what you’ve got to do. So if you’ve just gone through a divorce or are thinking of going through one, be prepared for some these effects of divorce you may experience.
Depression
The feeling of being a failure can grow in both or either partner, causing them to feel depressed. In extreme cases, they can even attempt to end their lives from an increased perception of low self-worth. The effects of divorce on adults psychologically is not talked about enough. If you’re feeling unusually low for an excessive period of time, or you can see some obvious signs of depression like demotivation and an unwillingness to get out of bed in the morning, you should probably talk to someone and consider getting external help.
Anger
This is especially true in case of divorce resulting from adultery. One partner feels cheated, and angry with the other partner. The after effects of divorce resulting from infidelity can range from intermittent anger to violent temper outbursts. Financial stresses in a relationship is the root cause of a lot of problems. Anger can also stem from the financial strain that a long drawn-out divorce and/or alimony can lead to. Basically, if the relationship was messy, be prepared for a messy divorce too. It will be hard – feeling consistent anger towards someone you once shared something so beautiful with. But you know they have done you wrong and you can’t go back in time and change what they did. Accept it, and try your best to move on. Don’t let this feeling of overwhelming anger weigh you down and ruin the rest of your life.
Anxiety
The cumulative stress of the decision, and what is probably the most lingering effects of divorce – anxiety. A long and hard divorce can lead to a sense of anxiety and negative emotions. The fear of social stigma attached to divorce, along with the grief for the end of your relationship, can lead to feelings of anxiety. Children are also prone to feeling abandoned, which can lead to separation anxiety. When it comes to their parents, children can foresee divorce, and don’t try to avoid the situation. It is best if they can see it coming and brace themselves rather than breaking the news to them as a shock. If you feel like your anxiety is getting out of hand, get help immediately. You could even talk to a family member or friend who has gone through something similar, and find comfort in solidarity. Anxiety is unfortunately one of the negative effects of divorce, and the only solution is identify the signs and help yourself.
Social isolation
Divorce is still not a practice that is accepted fully, without the social stigma of course. Couples who get divorced often face the social after effects of divorce including isolation, ridicule, and insensitive enquiries. Some people may even ridicule your reasons and pass comments like, ‘you could have made it work’. Friends of the couple, especially mutual friends, tend to take sides leading to either of the parties feeling left out. This is especially true in the case of a contested divorce. An uncontested divorce is ideal, but honestly speaking it doesn’t always happen. Losing friends and the support of people you love is not easy, and you may feel like you did something wrong. Don’t feel contempt just because someone hasn’t sided with you. Although this process is long and arduous, you will grow from the lessons you learnt, and truly find the friends you can rely on. Stop trying to make amends with the people who don’t value your friendship and understand your worth.
Negativity
Getting a divorce is always a painful experience, whether it is mutual or contested. The negative effects of divorce on adults and the whole process in general can result in a lot of hatred and conflict in all the parties involved. It is probably one of the worst after effects of a divorce. There is a lot of bitterness among all parties, and no matter how hard you try, you can’t resolve it. So don’t try to. If people are not mature enough to embrace the circumstances and let things go, don’t waste your time in trying to convince them. You know you deserve better. If you’re thinking of separating with your spouse, you will experience at least one of these effects of divorce, and you will feel sad. But life is all about perspective. If you’re able to accept it, brush it off, and have the motivation to start afresh, you know life has much better to offer you. All you’ve got to remember is that time heals all wounds.
